The time has officially come. I started work this week. It was met with extreme hesitation and resistance. Guess who has almost survived the whole week??! Me. While it is Thursday, and technically, we are still responsible for tomorrow's work day, I will call my first week back as successfully in the books.
The evenings have been not as chaotic as expected. Avery is surviving daycare... I didn't think otherwise. She is a sweet baby and Mrs. Brenda is amazing. Noah loves having her with him all day. He is very possessive over her and I think it is genuine. Noah has made the transition of "mommy is back at work" very well.
Physically, I am surviving. I quit nursing her the day I came back to school. Yep, I am a crazy person. I just quit. I weaned her all weekend and gave up cold turkey on Tuesday. I am painfully surviving. ;)
Avery Anne had her 2-month check up on Monday. She was described as long and lean. (Neither of those adjectives did she get from her momma, as I am not long, nor lean.) She was 10.9 lbs and 22.75 inches. I will post pictures soon!
Mills' Musings - Moments In Our World
Wife, Mother, Teacher, Friend. Aspiring to always be better than I was yesterday. This is the story of my life...
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Where Did The Time Go...
I am sitting in bed, watching Cullen iron his clothes, prepping for the week. I have the monitor on, listening for Noah, and I have a sweet, tiny girl fast asleep next to me. Life seems just about perfect. On the flip side... I am ending my last week at home with Little Miss. I get an ache in my stomach every time I think about it.
These past eight weeks have been incredibly difficult, wonderfully exhausting, memory FILLED, fuzzy at times and absolutely amazing. I have learned lessons; Oh boy, have I learned lessons. I am learning to be a mom of two while still being a wife and a friend who can remember anything. I am still learning to be a mom of a little boy who is ALL BOY and wants me only every once in a while. {If you were still wondering... yes, he still very much favors Cullen. No, having a new baby always around Mommy has not made him jealous or want me any more than before - which was minimal to begin with. ;)}
This week was going to be filled with lots of snuggles, lots of lesson planning, lots of down time with my little darlings while trying to adjust to getting up before the sun/son and staying up! Instead, I have spent the week holding my girl and really soaking her in, and playing with my other sweet darling in the afternoon before his daddy gets home and takes over in Noahland.
Oh, staying awake...that is going to be the hard part. So, it is time to prepare for the hard part... starting life back up. I have loved being at home. Let's see if I can make it all work. Say a prayer for me?!
These past eight weeks have been incredibly difficult, wonderfully exhausting, memory FILLED, fuzzy at times and absolutely amazing. I have learned lessons; Oh boy, have I learned lessons. I am learning to be a mom of two while still being a wife and a friend who can remember anything. I am still learning to be a mom of a little boy who is ALL BOY and wants me only every once in a while. {If you were still wondering... yes, he still very much favors Cullen. No, having a new baby always around Mommy has not made him jealous or want me any more than before - which was minimal to begin with. ;)}
This week was going to be filled with lots of snuggles, lots of lesson planning, lots of down time with my little darlings while trying to adjust to getting up before the sun/son and staying up! Instead, I have spent the week holding my girl and really soaking her in, and playing with my other sweet darling in the afternoon before his daddy gets home and takes over in Noahland.
Oh, staying awake...that is going to be the hard part. So, it is time to prepare for the hard part... starting life back up. I have loved being at home. Let's see if I can make it all work. Say a prayer for me?!
Friday, December 28, 2012
A Month In Pictures
I've taken quite a few pictures in the last month. While these are only ones from my phone, I thought I'd share.
...and due the fact that I'm doing the from my phone, I can't add captions until later.
Enjoy! I know I have.
...and due the fact that I'm doing the from my phone, I can't add captions until later.
Enjoy! I know I have.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
It's About Time
I know I am about one month too late on this post. I have promised a lot of people the story of Avery entering the world, and life since. So, without further ado...
I left school Friday afternoon, 11/16/12. I knew I had from Friday at 2:45 until Tuesday at Midnight to live life as a family of three, prepare the house and do any last minute things. So, I packed my school bag, told my kids good-bye and never looked back.
The weekend was filled with last minute things, spending time as a family and having one last "Cullen and Erin" date before being a family of four. Monday morning, I drove to Austin to have my sister color my hair (b/c God forbid I have bad hair in all of Avery girl's hospital pictures). On my way home from Austin, I got a phone call from Dr. Furman asking if I'd rather have my baby Tuesday instead of Wednesday. I said yes before total shock set in. I nervously drove to Cullen's work thinking about all of the things that all of the sudden were incredibly important... Like spending time with my son before I had a son and a daughter. Like cleaning the whole house. Like making sure I was packed up, and Noah was ready for a several day spend-the-night at both grandparent's houses. I hadn't called Cullen. I figured I would tell him in person. So, I arrived at MTV to tell Cullen. I wish I had his face on camera. We were both shocked. I picked up Noah and came home to play. We did whatever he wanted. After Cullen got home from work, we packed Noah up and headed to Coco's house for dinner and to drop the little buddy. We kissed him good-bye. I cried. Big time. Crocodile tears. Not pretty.
I had a hard time falling asleep that night. It wasn't until after midnight. Sad part was, we were scheduled to be at the hospital at 4:00 am. So, we arrive at the hospital and check in about 4:30. I get hooked up to my machines, get comfortable and settle into what I KNOW to be a very short process. After all, I'm already 4.5 cm dilated and 90% effaced. Well, several hours passed. Nothing. No progress. Nurses come in every 30-45 minutes complaining that they can't keep the monitors on Avery.
Around 11:00 am, the doctor on call said she wanted to break my water to speed things up... It was at that point that I asked for my epidural. Epidural in, I continued the waiting game. With each passing hour, I felt a bit deflated. I just wanted to have her here! We waited, waited and waited more. To spare ALL boring moments, we spent from 11:00 to 4:30 waiting around. At 4:30 or so, contractions started to pick up. I was feeling a tremendous amount of pressure and on-again off-again pain. I thought my epidural had worn off around this time. Other than the pain I was having, I could suddenly move my legs. I had total control over them, and I didn't earlier in the day.
So, I pushed the magic nurse button. Magic nurse Chris (who is so amazing, she deserves a blog post all on her own) came in about 4:45 to check on me. I told her about my pain/pressure/control of my legs. She had a doctor come check me and it turns out the doctor could see Avery's head.
Cullen is out in the hallway on the phone with my dad. He came bee-bopping in with the phone. I told him it was time to push and I think he lost his color temporarily. He hung up the phone. I was prepped. EIGHT MINUTES and THREE PUSHES later our darling little Avery Anne was here.
Now it's been a month. We are home, settling into what seems to be a routine. I've learned how to nurse a baby. This didn't work with Noah. I'm more than thankful it is working now. Noah is madly in love with his sister. He tells me many times daily how cute she is or how much he loves her. He will get anything for me that I need for her. He is such a sweet big brother. HOWEVER, the transition from only child to big brother for mom and dad was a different story. He has had a tough time sharing Cullen. He's not sleeping through the night. He's throwing huge fits of rage when things get tough or thing don't go his way. He is having a hard time sharing his toys with his friends. He's just in a time of transition. It's hard. But, then he'll have a spark, a fleeting moment, where he is so fun. Moments where he goes with the flow like he used to always do. We've learned that if we expend his energy, he is less apt to throw fits. He listens. We are praying for this time of transition to end. He is perfect with strangers and his day care worker. He is perfect for his grandparents. So, for now, we are learning to deal with the bit of resentment he has towards us. This too shall pass... Or so they say.
I left school Friday afternoon, 11/16/12. I knew I had from Friday at 2:45 until Tuesday at Midnight to live life as a family of three, prepare the house and do any last minute things. So, I packed my school bag, told my kids good-bye and never looked back.
The weekend was filled with last minute things, spending time as a family and having one last "Cullen and Erin" date before being a family of four. Monday morning, I drove to Austin to have my sister color my hair (b/c God forbid I have bad hair in all of Avery girl's hospital pictures). On my way home from Austin, I got a phone call from Dr. Furman asking if I'd rather have my baby Tuesday instead of Wednesday. I said yes before total shock set in. I nervously drove to Cullen's work thinking about all of the things that all of the sudden were incredibly important... Like spending time with my son before I had a son and a daughter. Like cleaning the whole house. Like making sure I was packed up, and Noah was ready for a several day spend-the-night at both grandparent's houses. I hadn't called Cullen. I figured I would tell him in person. So, I arrived at MTV to tell Cullen. I wish I had his face on camera. We were both shocked. I picked up Noah and came home to play. We did whatever he wanted. After Cullen got home from work, we packed Noah up and headed to Coco's house for dinner and to drop the little buddy. We kissed him good-bye. I cried. Big time. Crocodile tears. Not pretty.
I had a hard time falling asleep that night. It wasn't until after midnight. Sad part was, we were scheduled to be at the hospital at 4:00 am. So, we arrive at the hospital and check in about 4:30. I get hooked up to my machines, get comfortable and settle into what I KNOW to be a very short process. After all, I'm already 4.5 cm dilated and 90% effaced. Well, several hours passed. Nothing. No progress. Nurses come in every 30-45 minutes complaining that they can't keep the monitors on Avery.
Around 11:00 am, the doctor on call said she wanted to break my water to speed things up... It was at that point that I asked for my epidural. Epidural in, I continued the waiting game. With each passing hour, I felt a bit deflated. I just wanted to have her here! We waited, waited and waited more. To spare ALL boring moments, we spent from 11:00 to 4:30 waiting around. At 4:30 or so, contractions started to pick up. I was feeling a tremendous amount of pressure and on-again off-again pain. I thought my epidural had worn off around this time. Other than the pain I was having, I could suddenly move my legs. I had total control over them, and I didn't earlier in the day.
So, I pushed the magic nurse button. Magic nurse Chris (who is so amazing, she deserves a blog post all on her own) came in about 4:45 to check on me. I told her about my pain/pressure/control of my legs. She had a doctor come check me and it turns out the doctor could see Avery's head.
Cullen is out in the hallway on the phone with my dad. He came bee-bopping in with the phone. I told him it was time to push and I think he lost his color temporarily. He hung up the phone. I was prepped. EIGHT MINUTES and THREE PUSHES later our darling little Avery Anne was here.
Now it's been a month. We are home, settling into what seems to be a routine. I've learned how to nurse a baby. This didn't work with Noah. I'm more than thankful it is working now. Noah is madly in love with his sister. He tells me many times daily how cute she is or how much he loves her. He will get anything for me that I need for her. He is such a sweet big brother. HOWEVER, the transition from only child to big brother for mom and dad was a different story. He has had a tough time sharing Cullen. He's not sleeping through the night. He's throwing huge fits of rage when things get tough or thing don't go his way. He is having a hard time sharing his toys with his friends. He's just in a time of transition. It's hard. But, then he'll have a spark, a fleeting moment, where he is so fun. Moments where he goes with the flow like he used to always do. We've learned that if we expend his energy, he is less apt to throw fits. He listens. We are praying for this time of transition to end. He is perfect with strangers and his day care worker. He is perfect for his grandparents. So, for now, we are learning to deal with the bit of resentment he has towards us. This too shall pass... Or so they say.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Monday, November 12, 2012
Bittersweet, Party Of One.
Seven days to go. A glorious seven days until I will have two children, until I am a mother of a newborn again, until my life as I know it, will be forever changed.
I can't help but have very bittersweet feelings. While every fiber in my body is so excited to meet her and have her here to hold and be a part of our family, I am struggling with my relationship as I know it with Noah. He is my pride; he is who I am; he is my rock and my life as I know it. He is what keeps me awake at night pondering how to be a better person. He is my favorite little man, and he will tell you that. What do I do when he is not my only child? What do I do when one baby NEEDS to be held and one little man wants to be held? As far as he has ever known, he has been my only child...now he has to share me. Moms of multiple children, how do you do it??!
Noah and I spent the whole day together today. It was perfect. He snuggled with me all morning. He gave me as many kisses as I wanted. He loved me and told me he loved me all day. It was absolutely Heaven sent to spend one more wonderful day together, just him and I.
So, here is to preparing for Little Miss' arrival. A week or less... here we go!
I can't help but have very bittersweet feelings. While every fiber in my body is so excited to meet her and have her here to hold and be a part of our family, I am struggling with my relationship as I know it with Noah. He is my pride; he is who I am; he is my rock and my life as I know it. He is what keeps me awake at night pondering how to be a better person. He is my favorite little man, and he will tell you that. What do I do when he is not my only child? What do I do when one baby NEEDS to be held and one little man wants to be held? As far as he has ever known, he has been my only child...now he has to share me. Moms of multiple children, how do you do it??!
Noah and I spent the whole day together today. It was perfect. He snuggled with me all morning. He gave me as many kisses as I wanted. He loved me and told me he loved me all day. It was absolutely Heaven sent to spend one more wonderful day together, just him and I.
So, here is to preparing for Little Miss' arrival. A week or less... here we go!
Monday, November 5, 2012
Before Tomorrow...
Before tomorrow's appointment, I should update you QUICKLY on last
week's appointment. Last Tuesday, I had a baby appointment. I had prayed
for a week straight with lots and lots of tears for sweet Little Miss
to "flip". I needed her to not be breech. I needed her to do what she
should - turn over and get into position.
Sadly, it consumed my every spare thought. I couldn't move past it. Looking back now, I attribute that to the fact that Noah's labor and delivery was a cake-walk. I didn't expect anything short of the exact same thing for her.
As soon as Furman (OB) walked in, I could feel my whole body get hot, preparing for the worst... BUT, as it turns out, Little Miss did EXACTLY what she was supposed to do. She turned. She flipped. She is a good little girl.
With a heavy sigh of relief, I changed my prayer for this week. I thanked the Good Lord regularly. I also prayed she stayed head down.
I have an appointment in the morning tomorrow. I will see if she is still doing just what she should.
Regardless of Little Miss' position, I am between 3 and 4 cm dilated and 80% effaced... practically active labor! I also hadn't gained any more weight. WHOOP. I remember that towards the end with Noah; In fact, with him, I lost three pounds there at the end. Here is to hoping... but, my prayer is she is still head down, and making her way towards her grand entrance into this world. I am ready to meet my precious Little Miss.
Sadly, it consumed my every spare thought. I couldn't move past it. Looking back now, I attribute that to the fact that Noah's labor and delivery was a cake-walk. I didn't expect anything short of the exact same thing for her.
As soon as Furman (OB) walked in, I could feel my whole body get hot, preparing for the worst... BUT, as it turns out, Little Miss did EXACTLY what she was supposed to do. She turned. She flipped. She is a good little girl.
With a heavy sigh of relief, I changed my prayer for this week. I thanked the Good Lord regularly. I also prayed she stayed head down.
I have an appointment in the morning tomorrow. I will see if she is still doing just what she should.
Regardless of Little Miss' position, I am between 3 and 4 cm dilated and 80% effaced... practically active labor! I also hadn't gained any more weight. WHOOP. I remember that towards the end with Noah; In fact, with him, I lost three pounds there at the end. Here is to hoping... but, my prayer is she is still head down, and making her way towards her grand entrance into this world. I am ready to meet my precious Little Miss.
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Sweet Sentiments
Here are two things Noah has said tonight, that I never want to forget:
At dinner I asked Noah who Daddy was married to. He said "Spider Man". I corrected him by saying that Daddy is married to Mommy. But he insisted that "No. Daddy is married to Spider Man." This went back and forth for a while. Each time his rebuttal was the same... "No. Daddy is married to Spider-Man!"
Secondly, he was just trying to cuddle with me on the couch. After squirming around for a minute, he finally gets up and says, "Sorry Mommy. Your belly is too big." It is alright Doodlebug. It won't be much longer. You can have your mommy back.
At dinner I asked Noah who Daddy was married to. He said "Spider Man". I corrected him by saying that Daddy is married to Mommy. But he insisted that "No. Daddy is married to Spider Man." This went back and forth for a while. Each time his rebuttal was the same... "No. Daddy is married to Spider-Man!"
Secondly, he was just trying to cuddle with me on the couch. After squirming around for a minute, he finally gets up and says, "Sorry Mommy. Your belly is too big." It is alright Doodlebug. It won't be much longer. You can have your mommy back.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Wiggle and GIggle
This was a video I unloaded from the camera tonight. It is from this summer, and Noah's cousin Aubrey's house. This is a video I want to watch for years to come. I love the way this kid wiggles!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)