APPETIZER

Appetizer: a food or a drink that stimulates the appetite and is usually served before a meal (date 1820)

So last night, Erin and I met my old roommate from college, Phillip, at the Loading Dock in Georgetown to have some drinks and watch the Fiesta Bowl (what a good game it turned out to be). We showed up right around kickoff and ordered a few adult beverages (I had one of my favorites, Sam Adam's Winter Brew, a toasty/dark beer). Erin then proceeded to order some fried pickles, which was listed in the menu as an appetizer. Shortly thereafter, we got our drinks and started watching the game. About 15 minutes later, we got our second round of drinks but still no fried pickles. Erin, being a former server, was beginning to become a little impatient. At any rate, the server then brought our meals, still no fried pickles. We informed our server that we never received our fried pickles and here comes stupid quote #1, "Oh, you didn't get them?" My immediate thoughts were, "Are they on the table?", "Did you bring them to us?". The answer is obviously no. Our woman genius server then runs to the back, grabs some hot fried pickles, and then hurries them to our table. We continued on our way to eat our food, drink our drinks, and watch the game. As half time approached, we asked for our bill assuming the fried pickles would be taken care of. Bad assumption. We were charged for the appetizer that came with our meal. When the server came to get our bill, Phillip asks the lady, "Should we get charged for the fried pickles?" Insert stupid quote #2, "Well, they're still $4.99 whether you get them with your meal or before you meal." Huh? Did she just say what I thought she did? She then runs our bill to the back, attempting to split the bill. To no avail, she put Erin and I's bill on Phillip's card and vice versa. After fixing the debacle, Phillip then asks the server, "Aren't appetizers supposed to come before your meal?". Insert retard quote #3, "Well, some people like their fried pickles with their meal. And either way, their still the same price." The lady just didn't get it. I guess we somehow missed something. Since 1820 (referring to the definition above), an appetizer has been defined as something that comes before your meal. Her only saving grace, if there really is any, is the one minute clause in the definition, the word usually. Still, the woman was a complete moron, incapable of understanding the fact that we wanted our fried pickles before our meal.

-Cullen